My body makes a funny sound

I’ve got to the devastating age when you have to start paying a bit closer attention to the weird sounds your body is making. No, not those ones. Like a few years ago when we were in Strasbourg for a few days and I was stretching my arms out behind me in a languid fashion and heard a rssssht sound like velcro come from somewhere near my right ear.

It wasn’t immediately painful, I wasn’t tempted to roll around on the floor or anything, but any sudden movement from my arm would result in a temporarily demobilising pain. Turned out I’d torn my RSJ. No, that’s the living room one. The shoulder one is the rotator cuff. Still hurts a little occasionally, even now, but I suppose I have to accept that I am simply getting old and need to warm up thoroughly before I stretch in the morning.

Just now I sort of puffed my cheeks out as if I was blowing up a balloon and there was a fizzing sound in the back of my jaw, like I’d tipped over a bottle of lemonade by accident. Random bodily function or minor life impacting ailment? Well, that’s the fun these days, when so many exciting alternatives are the preserve of much younger folk than me.