Where do people get stuff in a city like London? I find it busy – if you were anywhere else you could pop into town for a few bits and pieces, or there would be a bus to your local 24-hour supermarket. There are some little shops and an incomprehensibly laid-out Sainsbury’s in Forest Hill, but apart from that you’ve absolutely no idea where anything is. I have a 20-minute bus ride to church on a Sunday morning, I now have a theory that the different areas of London are divided by fried chicken shops – it’s the surefire way to mark your progress through the city. Even if I popped into town I still wouldn’t have a clue where all the shops are – I know that if I go to Oxford Street I could get some overpriced souvenirs, or ripped off in a well-known high street chain there for the kudos, but whither a nice little Debenhams, or a smart row of pound shops? We’re not in Bangor anymore, Toto.

Also, London is really sweaty – which leads me onto my second question of the post: how on earth do people get dressed in London? Take my trip to work in the morning – 2/3 hundred metres to the railway station, an overland trip and then an underground hop. It’s quite nippy today, slight chance of rain – so you’d wrap up slightly, wear something a bit warmer, but then there’s the problem that there will be six thousand people crammed into your train carriage and the underground is like a Swedish sauna full of homeless people. Constant dilemmas…

Tags: this'n'that

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